Here’s a festive post to make you chuckle. On our Facebook page, we asked our fans to share their favourite funnies from festive crackers – here are their 20 best Christmas jokes that got us giggling!
Thanks for sharing! If you have your own, please add them in the comments section.
What does the Queen call her Christmas Broadcast?
The One Show.
Why did nobody buy Rudolph and Blitzen on ebay?
Because they were two deer.
Juliet Irene Wilson
What did the snowman say to the aggressive carrot?
Get out of my face
Honey G just got sacked by Santa… He said she’s really bad at wrapping!
What do you call a bunch of chess players bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!
Carrie Lou Talbot-Ashby
What happened to the man who stole the advent calendar?
He got 25 days.
What’s worse than Rudolph with a runny nose?
Frosty the snowman with a hot flush!
The three wise men brought the infant Jesus some gold and two types of fancy perfume…
I’m guessing they were expecting a girl.
What do you sing at a Snowman’s party?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
What do you call an old snowman?
Santa’s main elf has quit and set up his own toy business right next to Santa’s after a huge row.
He’s a rebel without a Claus!
Debz Lea Clarke
Why was the turkey in the pop group?
Because he was the only one with drumsticks!
What do Santa’s little helpers learn at school?
Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas?
Two snowmen in a field. One says to the other.. can you smell carrots?
Vicky Evans Jones
Why was the snowman looking through the carrots in the supermarket?
He was picking his nose!
What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?
Why does Santa have three gardens?
So he can ‘ho ho ho’!
What’s green, covered in tinsel and goes ribbet ribbet?
Shelley J Stevenson
What is the best Christmas present in the world?
A broken drum, you just can’t beat it!